8/08/2015

Munich Chief Prosecutor Hummer, there is only one thing for me to ask you: Who the fuck do you think you are?


Esteemed Chief Prosecutor Hummer of the court in Munich, province of Bavaria,

In reference to your letter from the Dais of Exquisite Law dated Half Moon of the Month of July in the Year two thousand fifteen you unselfishly granted yourself the liberty to brief me via an apodictic statement about the peculiarities of venting an opinion. You chose to phrase it as follows when I had lamented falsifications of Nazi history in certain publications on German TV:
"Apart from that, comparisons between the acts of the accused on the one hand and press and TV-coverage on the other hand are out of the question, because the latter regularly serve as political information, report on events of current affairs or history and therefore are according to § 86 no. 3 in conjunction with § 86 a no. 3 Penal Code exempted from the offense. The actions of the defendant, however, do not fall under that exception as the Court of Appeal has set out in detail and without any error of law (UA p.7)."
You seriously dare to forbid me criticize falsification of history in a movie about Hitler's rise 'Aufstieg des Bösen'? You want to question my opinion about these never-ending documentaries on German TV about the Nazi time being a latent glorification of that time? You got to be kidding.

Whilst your ductus appears to be convincing prima facie, for the distinguished mind it conveys itself as a circulus in probando and I can't help but sense a certain proclivity on your part to stifle any form of critique and sounding off rather Cartmanesque.

Granted, pontificating has a history in the bucolic province of Bavaria but as you certainly know in your Kasbah of Jurisprudence, Bertrand Russell incidentally observed once, "The method of 'postulating' what we want has many advantages; they are the same as the advantages of theft over honest toil." Would it perhaps ring a bell, Your exalted Honor?

The way you elected to write, I am sorry, but you tested negative for charisma and I am feeling also terribly sorry it did not resonate on your radar, but it's my opinion. So after listening to your rodomontade, there is only one thing for me to ask you: Who the fuck do you think you are?

We live in the 21st Century and where I come from - and it's certainly not fucking Bavaria - we believe in free speech and that's how I educate my daughter. On what basis and, more importantly, on what legal grounds do you dare to forbid me to voice my opinion? I have no idea about your age, but this might be a good time for you to hone your education in order to learn how far you may go and where you stop dead in your tracks when communicating with other human beings. Have you fucking understood me!

It's been an utmost privilege being granted your attention, arbiter elegantiarum, and should you feel to have any questions, please do not hesitate to contact me. Service is my mantra, deliverance my devotion.

Oh before I forget, there are only two questions left: what would Louis Litt say and what would be the take of the guys at Popehat.com?

Sincerely,

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