If this German gentleman only knew his meme

Peter S. seemed to enjoy a great weekend and invigorated he set out and devoted part of slightly rainy Saturday to pen some comments and ship them to me via the interwebz. Four, to be precise.

Peter takes exception at some of my posts and finally sets out for the killer punch, they are Tourette's-like. He is precisely referring to the term "Sexually-lascivious outfit" as being in that department of neurological disorder.

Peter also detects censorship on my blog. To which I respond that this is my blog and any input that enhances the subject matter - and that subject matter is clearly neoliberal economics and its effects - I am all too ready to cross-post. There are various examples of this where I cross-posted articles pertaining to that subject matter. The vast majority of them are foreign posts and the reason is, there are not many interesting posts from German bloggers on economic matters.

I encourage Peter to start his own blog and if I find his posts interesting, I will be one of the first to follow his feed.

Back to Peter's emails. When you are out of arguments, disagree with the opinion of others, there comes the mental argument blow. It's like Godwin's Law. Peter also seems to lack logical thinking when he claims censorship on this blog and at the same time invokes the German libel/slander article 185 STGB. That article is a clear injunction of free speech, but try to tell that to someone from the country of the poets and intellectuals with a mandatory propaganda fee on TV and radio.

It is not exactly Breaking News that Germans have absolutely no sense of humor, but Peter's accusation is an oh so typical example of 'Know your Meme'.

So let's dig a little into that Tourette meme.

You may find Adele's latest songs a little heavy and heartachey, and prefer "This better be the Puffy daddy version of this song, and not that STING PIECE OF SHIT!FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!"

Sure, you can wave a problem off as being 'disappointing'. You might as well brush it away by not giving A DEAD MOOSES' LAST SHIT!!!

Hey, you are sick, you are suffering from Tourette's, when in fact people are advising you to get the fuck in line, adapt, suck c%ck, stop criticizing and be a good citizen and a dependable racist. Viz Cologne as the latest example.

The grandseigneur of etymology considers "Sexually-lascivious outfit" to be libel. Well, dude, that's a matter of personal taste and that is most certainly covered by free speech. Besides, I have no fucking clue what you are talking about.

Getty Images

Finally, Peter's mood changes to the altruistic in that typical German way of prying into other people's life: he pities my daughter.

Peter, rest absolutely assured. My daughter combines those wonderful Asian traits like politeness, that smile, can dance like hell and all divine, looks good (small wonder), is courteous and combines that with a Western kick- ass mouth if the situation asks for it and is irreverent, just like me. IOW, she is pure fun and delight. Just like me.

Lastly, to add insult to injury, Peter accuses me to be overly intellectual. That hurts, Peter, but I am a person of integrity and not easily bought. What was the amount you offered again???

This one I know, Peter, together with Stephen Fry: “The sort of twee person who thinks swearing is in any way a sign of a lack of education or a lack of verbal interest is just a fucking lunatic.”

And to reconcile everything, let's go to South Park.

Rechtsanwalt Aiko Petersen, mein Versuch Wittgensteinscher Sprachpräzision liess vermutlich den Forderungscharakter nebulös erscheinen

Herr Petersen,

Zuweilen unterliege ich in meinem eitlen Bestreben nach Wittgensteinscher Sprachpräzision einer dem Sujet geschuldeten prolixen Elongation des eigentlichen Themas mit dem Resultat unentschuldbarer nebulöser Exegese. Mea culpa.

So muss es wohl gewesen sein - oder war es der  Hennessy? - als in meiner Email vom 15. des Monats der frohstimmenden Kunde der Geburt eines jungen spirituellen Superstars, dem Justin Bieber der Christen wenn man so will, recht eigentlich meine subkutane Intention war, einer retroversen QE das Wort zu reden, nachdem wir schmerzlichst die Absenz irgend einer Form von Gegenleistung konstatieren mussten. Kaufmännisch konservativ getüncht, konfirmiert entlang der noblen -  zugegebenermassen in neoliberalen Zeiten flüchtigen - Ehrlichkeit und als Proponent der protestantischen Arbeitsethik wohltemperiert komponiert. Zumindest wie ich eitel dachte. Gerade diese meine kaufmännische Konservativität liess mich immerzu das replacement cost risk im Auge behalten. Old habits die hard, sagt man wohl.

Vielleicht suggeriert auch dieses vorab erwähnte QE in sehr laxer Auslegung eine gewisse Adäquanz wenn wir es einen 'Asset Swap' nennen. Ich denke dieser Begriff ist für den Laien wohlklingend und unverfänglich, für den Kenner pointierte Prägnanz mit einem Touch sozialer Akzeptanz.

So Sie vermutlich berufsbedingt zu einer anderen Interpretation geneigt sind, möchte ich an die Psychologin Ellen Langer erinnern, die bekannterweise in 1975 formulierte “an expectancy of personal success probability inappropriately higher than the objective probability would warrant.” Dies, so denke ich, gellte es zu bedenken.

Ja und dann fiel mir irgendwie Dan Hulls kontemporäres Statement über lawyer professionalism ein. Immer wieder gut dieser Mann und nicht so scheissenlangweilig wie deutsche Lawyer Blogs (oops, sorry. Nein, nicht wirklich)

    Lawyer professionalism is a morally pretentious, archaic, hypocritical and silly movement which [some bar communities] tend to invest in heavily to protect and coddle apathetic, mediocre and lazy lawyering. It keeps standards low, and the tone lawyer-centric. It is pro-lawyer, anti-client, prissy, routinely and dishonestly misused by incompetent and uncaring lawyers in defense of their delays and screw ups, and a waste of time and money.

Genug meiner bekannt prolixen Art der Selbstverwirklichung. Ich erwarte die Zurückzahlung der Summe von € 209 bis zum Dienstag, 19.01.2016. Bei Verstreichen sehe ich mich zu juristischen Schritten gezwungen.

Parbleu, ich muss rephrasieren. Das wäre ja meine Tochter, die klagt. Ach du liebes Billiglohnland Deutschland. Eine Migrantin muss klagen. In einem Land mit Willkommenskultur.

Sagen Sie, ist das wahr, was sich mir da in Pixelform auf der Screen offenbart? Hartz (also der mit den brasilo Nutten) Rechtsanwälte zahlen dem rustikalen Harald Thomé, Reichs-Attaché zur normengerechten Armutsbewältigung im Spektrum neoliberaler Ökonomie, 120 europäische Rupien plus MWSt pro Jahr für einen Eintrag auf einer (tab delimited?) Datenbank???? Einer Datenbank eines eingetragenen Vereins?????? In Gottes Namen, was ist Deutschland für eine Bananenrepublik.

Cheerio,

Anette Farrenkopf, was ist da in den Schlüpfer, ich rephrasiere, in die Hose gegangen im Dezember im Jobcenter München?

Anette aus Verweilheim direkt inne Provinzmetropole

Wertes Fräulein Anette Farrenkopf,

Zunächst, wie sich das so konveniert inne Republik, a Guats Neies.

Fräulein Anette, im guaten Oiden trug es sich zu, das zum zehnten des letzten Monates des Jahres zwanzig und zehn fünf ein Brief von unserer EssBeh Silke Strama zu papierener Pixelfom erkoren wurde und sodann, behördlich expediert, mit einem föderal-postalischen Stempel, der sich zehn sieben des selbigen vorab genannten Monats las und sich alsbaldigst zum Tage des zwanzigsten wiederum des selbigen vorab genannten Monats in unserem zum Behufe der Rezeption postalischer Kommunikationsinstrumente angebrachten blechernen Behältnisses wiederfand. Parbleu, erlauben Sie mir zu präzisieren. Es waren desselben zwei Exemplare. Eines an meine kecke schwarzhaarige Tochter, die mir immer wieder ins Wort fällt und ein wertvolles Exemplar an die meine Wertigkeit.

Als wir der Briefe Siegel gebrochen und uns der Lektüre des nassforsch gehaltenen Inhalts jener Episteln zugewandt hatten, trug es sich zu, dass meiner Tochter Blick sich mit meinen Rehaugen kreuzten .... Ja, was soll ich sagen, geschätzte Hofdame der föderal-deutschen Behörde zur Verpflichtung pekuniär insuffizienter Beschäftigungen, wir fanden uns beide in vorweihnachtlicher Zeit in einem eigentlich nicht antizipierten Zustand der Perplextheit. Nun ist mir endlich die Bedeutung des Wortes 'Advent' erleuchtet worden.

Gewohnt der sprichtwörtlichen deutschen Gründlichkeit schickten wir uns an, selbige Schrift einer zweiten, diesmal wie wir beide meinten, einer noch intensiveren und konzentrierten Lektüre zu unterziehen. Allein, wir wurden in unserem ersten Ergebnis bestätigt. Unsere konsequente Anwendung des Popperschen Falzifikationsprinzips zeitigte eindeutig immer und verlässlich das gleiche Resultat: der im Brief angegebene Fristtermin des zwanzig siebten Tages des vorab genannten Monats ist ein Sonntag.

Damit nicht genug. Als devot agnostische okzidentale Spiritualisten pflegen wir im engen Familienkreis die Niederkunft einer sehr rechtschaffenen jungen Dame in wilder Ehe mit einem Herren vor etlichen, etlichen Monden lebend transzendental und orthodox zu zelebrieren. Selbige spirituelle Seancen erstrecken sich tradiert und innig gefolgt bei uns über die Tage des zwanzig vierten, des zwanzig fünften sowie des zwanzig sechsten Tages selbigen Monats.

Darf ich Ihnen, geschätzte föderal-behördliche Dame auf 30%iger staatlich oktruierter Quote agierend bei der Behörde zur Bereitstellung sämtlicher Opportunitäten der persönlichen Selbstverwirklichung im Spektrum pekuniär defizienter Remunerationsoptionen und wie jüngst lobend kostatiert werden konnte, Sie auch Ihren Charme ganz in die berühmte deutsche Willkommrenskultur einfliessen liessen, um selbstaufopfernd ausländischen Fachkräften die Vorzüge der niederqualifizierten Beschäftigungen, vulgo Pisserjobs, nahezubringen, höflichst nahelegen, den tradierten festlichen Tagen der Freude und inneren Selbstreflexion die ihnen gebührende Würdigung zu gewähren? Grazie.

Profan ausgedrückt, ging da wieder was in den Schlüpfer, pardon, ich rephrasiere, die Hose in der JC Hütte? Also ich bebe förmlich vor testosterongeladener Sicherheit, dass Sie, Fräulein Anette, Ihre volle professionelle Schaffenskraft einer 30%igen föderaldeutschen Quotenfrau in den Ring werfen, um dieses Malheur einer gebührenden, remedierenden, (1) und mit der Verve der übrigen 70% einer ultimativ summa summarum 100%igen Zufriedenheit zuzuführen.

Noch anders ausgedrückt mein Fräulein: falls Sie noch nicht so weit sind zu wissen, das solche Briefe mit bewusst und in krimineller Absicht verzögerter Versendung nicht über Weihnachten versandt werden, dann dürfen Sie sich glücklich schätzen mich zu kennen. Ich, der es Ihnen glasklar macht, wie weit Sie gehen und wo Sie stoppen.

Wir von unserer Seite werden Ihrer reichsdeutschen Behörde Anliegen die notwendige anwaltliche Aufmerksamkeit zukommen lassen.

Ihre ungeteilte Aufmerksamkeit haben wir wohlwollend zur Kenntnis genommen und wir empfehlen uns

mit vorzüglichen Grüssen

Xxx (2)

_____________
(1) Sie werden sicher dieses Oxford Komma zu schätzen wissen.
(2) Wir sehen es als Bestätigung Ihrer sozio-kulturellen Expertise, dass das Jobcenter München weiss, der Name 'Dolkhar' ist immer feminin. Wie erfrischend, wenn man dies mit der Tollpatschigkeit und Bauernhaftigkeit des Münchner Gerichtes vergleicht. Kudos!

Is it OK to call a prosecutor retarded (1)? Because if it is, then Munich prosecutor Peter Preuss is pretty retarded...

Same court hearing in 2013. It's not exactly a new observation that people exhibiting insecurity in public also have some other quirks. Some seem to think they need to resort to a weird form of posing. Male agonistic behavior. You could call some of these traits infantile, while you might call other forms as being borderline retarded. You be the judge:

During that court hearing, when the judge made some notes and there was therefore some slack time, Peter Preuss had a splendid idea on how to pass his idle time and clearly make his impression felt. Like provincial pompousness or something in that vein. Setting a territorial smell mark.

So judge Grain was busy jotting down some lines when I experienced that strange feeling that someone is watching you. Not just watching you, but staring at you. I looked up and there was Peter Preuss indeed fixing me with his eyes.

I looked away because, hey, who would do that? Certainly not a grown-up person, let alone a person with style. Yet there was the feeling again. The Peter, yes, prosecutor Peter Preuss indeed was staring at me ... intensely, motionless ... could this be real? Are you kidding? A grown up person in a court room tried to stare me down.

Hold on a sec, Peter Preuss. I have been into sports all my life and if someone, regardless who it is, presents a challenge to me, I respond. I respond in my way. You know, Peter, the one who blinks first or avoids the gaze has lost. Are you ready? Do you fucking have what it takes?

Yep, Peter Preuss lost. Now educated people would think that was that. No, not Peter Preuss. He tried a second time to stare me down ... and of course he lost again.

You see, it's one thing to be a state prosecutor based on the realization years back that you do not have the stuff needed to get into a top Anglo-saxon law firm and if you would try, you'd be accompanied to the lift by Donna and ushered down.

It's a totally different thing not knowing that in a stare-down the most important thing is to slightly defocus when looking at someone. Well, any 14-year old is aware of that. Not Peter Preuss. Just saying.

Oh, it would not be vintage Peter Preuss had he not tried the same in the court hearing on Jan. 6, 2015. This time I just did not commit. These juvenile things get boring. You know, Peter Preuss, get a life and get mature.
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(1) or would that trigger Germany's most ridiculous paragraph? The libel §185 STGB.

Den Tee rührt Rechtsanwältin Aglaia Muth nicht an

Anwältin Aglaia Muth

Da ich doch wegen meiner Gerichtsherumsitzerin Rechtsanwältin Aglaia Muth die Schlichtungsstelle Berlin angerufen habe, fiel mir doch dieses hier von Dan Hull ein.

That's not Aglaia Muth's cup of tea.

.) Excerpts from Rules 1, 5 and 6:

    1. We come first. Be nice--but if in doubt, use the rules. If you feel you know the lawyers you are dealing with, we will follow your advice and instincts. If you are in doubt about the lawyers, or if it might compromise us to deviate from the formal procedural rules, please stay close to those rules.

    5. If you have, or would like to have, a personal relationship with opposing counsel, that's fine, but don't let the relationship hurt us--the client. We don't care as much as you do about your maintaining or developing collegiality with other lawyers in your jurisdiction; in fact, we could not care less.

    6. If opposing counsel shows animosity toward you for following the procedural rules and keeping things moving, that is tough. This is not about the lawyers. We hired you to represent us. We would like you to get this done. Again, as your client, we seldom think that aggression and persistence are "unprofessional".

via What about Clients

Auf dem Ohr ist sie völlig taub:

Rule Five: "Over-Communicate": Bombard, Copy and Confirm

I am indebted to Jay Foonberg for the inspiration for Rule 5--both "bombarding" and the idea of keeping clients continuously informed. Nearly all of my better thoughts about practice management are influenced by Foonberg. The notion of "bombarding" clients with paper and information does have obvious exceptions. For instance, you work with a GC who trusts you and wants you to leave her alone. She doesn't want you to copy her on every transmittal letter or e-mail. Fair enough. Just be 100% sure you know what she wants and doesn't want. But aside from that, this is a "can't miss" rule--and I am amazed that many good lawyers express surprise that my firm informs the client of everything at each step of the way, and copies our clients on everything.

Meet Munich prosecutor Peter Preuss: Specialist for frivolous law suits. He is quite a chap.

Peter Preuss and the speech bump

Ever wanted to know what a 'nerd' is but were too lazy to consult a dictionary? Relax and just look at Munich prosecutor Peter Preuss. Provincial legend!

I met almost bald Peter Preuss in February 2013 the first time in person in court. I had to deal with him before, but more about that silly incident in a later post. After all, infantility can wait a little. Or is it retardation?

So in February of said year, Munich prosecutor Peter Preuss elevated himself from his seat and stood there in his black bath robe to plead his case in front of the judge. The Peter started and the first sentence was alright. Peter Preuss ventilated the second sentence and it was alright. Peter Preuss intoned the third sentence and is was al..., wait a second, what was that, Peter? There was a sort of a hickup, a kind of gulp ... Something a person would do when he feels insecure, not quite comfy speaking in front of - not many in this case - others.

It was so conspicuous and even more so as he was addressing a judge he sure knew very well from cases before. Yet there he stood now, clearly inhibited and in way like a 'Pennäler' talking and looking as he continued his case in front of the judge who seemed to be his age. This made the situation even more funny. He made the impression and articulated himself like someone would do who is eager to please his master. He was all servile, self-deprecating to the extent of  slight embarrassment.

Sure, everyone can have a bad day, when you just cannot seem to find your script, words don't flow, they just evade you, kind of a verbal writer's block. However, I was quite sure the Peter is an odd character, nerdy, bent on pleasing superiors and lacking self-esteem. The kind of guy everyone has met in his or her school days back then.

A couple weeks later that silly court case with F1 Bernie Ecclestone and an ex-Bavarian banker started (1). I was watching my daily 45 minutes of German TV and was about to switch off, boring as German TV is, when the reporter mentioned Peter Preuss as being the prosecutor. Gee, I had an instinctive feeling that this will get interesting and I should listen. So I stayed on. Peter came onscreen and started his sermon. First sentence went well, second sentence very nice, Peter. Third sentence excell...., hold it, there it was again, the hickup. It was hilarious to watch. Exactly the Peter I had come to know just weeks back. Busted!

It proved once again, these kind of instances are not singular, rather that they point to a deep seated insecurity and one can be sure, where that came from some other weird traits can be expected. Indeed, prosecutor Peter Preuss does not disappoint and is ready to prove that he is quite some chap, and a really odd one at that.

Is this infantility or bordering on retardation?

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(1) yep, the one in which Bernie agreed to pay 100 million euro just to get out of fucking boring Bavaria and a totally ridiculous court case. Bernie later sent a hilarious postcard.

Bedingungsloses Grundeinkommen versus Job Guarantee

Diskussion aus amerikanischer Sicht. Interessant für deutsche Ökonomen könnte Tschernevas Feststellung sein, dass der Staat Inflation über Arbeitslosigkeit steuert. Pssst, nicht Frank-Jürgen, Heini und Andrea sagen.

Die Nachteile der EU kommen exakt bei der 2 Stunden Marke zur Sprache.

H/T naked capitalism

Wer Lust auf unterhaltsamen Nonsense hat, findet ihn bei Götz Werner.